Day #92/Day #1

Today we had surgery. How do you prepare for an event like this? When I was in high school, a car ran a stop sign and t-boned me, rolling my car multiple times trapping me upside down. I had to punch a window out to get out of the car. The next year, while I was hunting I got shot at. Last summer while working in the ghetto, someone drove by my job site and took a pop shot out the window of their car with a pistol at my building/me/who knows what for fun.

In all three of those cases, I was scared. So scared I was shaking.

Tonight I couldn't hold my fork while I tried to eat my poorly made salad. I was shaking. My dad tried to distract me with conversations about Michigan State, about life. We talked about work, about the miata, about a lot of other topics that I listened to, talked about, and remember nothing of. Inside I was trembling. I was scared. Not for me. I was scared for my wife. Her life, the life of my unborn son, were in the more than capable hands of our neurosurgeon, our OB, our neo-natologist, our anaesthesiologist(s), and several nurses. I was scared for Juliet, to grow up without her mama. I was scared to have something happen, and regret this decision for the rest of my life. I have never been so scared.

In a time like this, just sitting there, watching the waiting room pager to buzz letting me know Dr. Ahldgren was done and was coming to talk to me, there's one thing you can hold on to.

God is good all the time. All the time God is good. He is, was, and will be in control of this situation. All that we can do is step forward in faith, and trust that he will work this situation for good.

Finally Dr. Ahldgren came and talked to me. The surgery went great. He was able to fix the disc, fix her spine, and the nerve has been fixed as well. Our son is safe, Liz is safe, and the healing has begun. He thinks that as long as she takes care of herself, she should never have another disc problem.

God is good all the time. All the time God is good.

I gave my dad the good news, and he took off to head home. I went and sat in my truck waiting until I could see Liz when she got out of post-op recovery. I started crying. I was so relieved. Tears of joy, of fear, anxiety, just came out. Pent up emotion from 92 days of waiting, Dr's appointments, sleepless nights, anger, frustration, they all got let go in the form of tears. Just rolling down my cheeks.

God is good all the time. All the time God is good.

I never doubted those words, I have told myself those words over and over, but they have never had such powerful meaning until the minute that Dr. walked out and told me everyone was fine.

God is good all the time. All the time God is good.

Somehow I knew He would glorify Himself in this situation. In 15 years, Dr. Ahldgren has done surgery on pregnant women 6 times. Liz was lucky #7. A little numerology anyone? God gets the glory in this one.

A lot of people were praying. We knew they were. We could feel it. I felt those prayers like a hurricane. Thanks to everyone for the continued prayers.

Liz starts recovering now. She is in a lot of pain, but that's nothing new. She however doesn't have any nerve pain, and she can finally lay on her back. For the first time in 91 days. We know its going to be a long road, and tough as her belly continues to grow, but we are excited to finally be on the road to recovery. I told someone on the phone tonight, it's exciting, because for the last 91 days, it didn't feel like there was a light at the end of the tunnel. It didn't even feel like we had entered the tunnel yet. Now, we can see the end, and we are excited to get her back on her feet and back to being the mother she wants to be to Juliet, and our unborn son.

We will never take the little things for granted again. We are excited to go for walks together. She can't wait to go to Meijer's and go shopping. We can't wait to throw a Frisbee, to dance together at weddings. She can't wait to stand up without hunching over.

Please keep praying for a swift recovery. We love you all, and are infinitely thankful for your continued prayer and support.

God is good all the time. All the time God is good.